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Having Fraternal or Identical Twins

I would love to have twins. How frequently have I heard that? The truth of having twins is far different from the sweeping statement of how much you would like to have twins. Don't misunderstand me being a twin mother is the best and I have two sets of twins - how greedy am I! I truthfully can't imagine not having twins but what does having twins mean in reality; let me tell you.

It means initially you are exhausted and subjected to sleep deprivation and would love to get your twins sleeping through the night. It means you frequently forego private luxuries such as shaving or waxing your legs, styling your hair or applying your make up. A shower is a requirement but don't even think about having time for a calming bubble bath "it just doesn't occur! You forget to feed yourself and possibly survive on bars of chocolate unless some nice family member or friend stop by and make you a mug of tea and a sandwich.

Night feeds have rolled in to one misty blur and you forget who you fed, when and which crib you placed which twin particularly if you have identical twins. Identical twins who look different to each other throughout the day to their mum and dad look the same at night when you're just about functioning.

You consistently monitor the fridge double checking you have enough bottles of milk prepared. The steriliser and kettle become the most used items in the kitchen and you get seriously frustrated if someone comes and re-boils the kettle for a cup of tea when you required that cooling boiling water for more baby feeds! At this point you realise that a second kettle would be exceedingly helpful.

You relax immediately your husband walks through the door so just so you can pass him one baby to hold; likewise when visitors call you do the same. Having a break means only having one baby to feed or one baby to bum change whilst your willing assistant takes care of the other; remembering you'll always be attached to at least one baby.
You are likely to wish you had become a pro in Yoga as you struggle to cuddle or feed 2 babies at the same time. You regularly find yourselves using both legs and arms to juggle your babies and feeling somewhat like an Octopus or wishing you were!

As a twin parent you'll become really used to the attention that twins get when out and you'll understand that strangers like to ask the most inappropriate questions about how you gave birth and worse you attempt to answer them. Then there will be the questions where you have to bite your tongue and be humourous such as "are they identical?" when clearly they're one boy and one girl.

You find yourself pre-occupied by the shops which have double doors and the facilities provided for those with wide load buggies,, lackof double supermarket trolleys and will curse those who aren't courteous when they see you struggling. You'll also feel very deeply about parent and child parking bays and curse under your breath at fat, lazy men in white wagons who select to use them purely because they're ignorant.

You understand you need a bank loan simply to purchase the nappies, formula, clothing, safety gates and other equipment for your twins. Unless you are Mariah Carey, Angelina Jolie, Celine Dion or J-Lo you will be looking for creative methods to save on this sort of spending.

As your twins age you will realise that play parks with climbing apparatus or indeed soft play areas are not a place you can go single handed with your twins. You can be sure it will provide an exercise session full of sweat, your sweat when you do go whilst other mothers are sitting back chill axing with a coffee and a gossip you on the other hand will be doing a headless chicken routine helping two babies climb here and there in different directions.

Most of all, you'll find that unless you talk to another parent of twins the majority will not truly understand what you're talking about and they can still say "I would love to have twins". At that point you understand you are not simply a parent you are a parent of twins!

Mum of Two Sets of Twins shares her own experiences of twin pregnancy and twin parenting on her web site twinstips.com